It’s An Aroma Like Roma

If At First You Don’t Succeed, Fry, Fry Again

Scientists say we love the smell of chips because they include a mixture of aromas - including butterscotch, onion and ironing boards. Researcher Dr Graham Clayton said: "The chip doesn't smell of just chips. The aroma is much more complex and probably explains why chips are everyone's favourite."

FOOTNOTE: A block off the old chip.

Testing Time

Next Time, Try Putting The Cart Before The Horse

Traffic police in Romania tested a horse for alcohol after the cart it was pulling hit a man who was sitting on a bench. The officers, from Lelesti in Gorj county, asked a vet to conduct a blood test which turned out positive. Police suspect the horse might have been given alcohol to make it look stronger and healthier before it was sold.

FOOTNOTE: Cart blanch.

Passing Out Parade

Forsaking The 'High' Life

A Romanian man has lodged an official complaint after he got drunk on a single can of beer. Iancu Boroi bought the beer at a local supermarket in Arges in southern Romania but was so drunk after just one can that he nearly passed out. He said: "It is ridiculous to think one can of beer can get me so drunk. He has written to Romania's Consumer Protection Office, demanding compensation.

FOOTNOTE: No can do.

Explosive Revelation

Some Schemes Always Bomb Out

This isn’t a case of hoe, hoe, hoe. Romanian firefighters were shocked to learn a farmer was using an unexploded missile as an anvil. The 122mm calibre missile, discovered by the man in his garden in Puieni village, Giurgiu county, a few months ago, had been used for sharpening hoes and scythes. The missile was destroyed in a controlled explosion by an army bomb squad.

FOOTNOTE: Out of scythe, out of mind.

It’s A Bird, It’s A Plainclothes Policeman

No, It’s Superman (We Think)

Police are investigating after villagers in Romania claimed to see a Superman-like figure flying through the sky. Almost 20 villagers, from Gemeni, Mehedinti county, claim the UFO was wearing a shiny blue suit, just like Superman's. Police officers took written statements from all of the witnesses and say they described the figure in the same way. Constantin Toader, 41, said: "He looked like Superman and was flying slowly at about 100 yards from the ground in a standing position. He didn't make any smoke or sound. Just cruising around."

FOOTNOTE: Krypton eyed.

It’s Murder Finding Your Way Home

This Bloke Went On Dead Reckoning

A Romanian man confessed to a murder he did not commit because he wanted a lift home. Marius Varzar, 23, from Botosani, had run out of money so he told a police patrol in a village 160 kilometres from his home that he had killed one of his friends and wanted to give himself up. He was arrested and taken to Botosani, where officers were investigating the case of a man found dead in the street. Varzar was fined for wasting police time.

Hairpin Benz

Romanian Baby Named After Mercedes Model

A Romanian luxury car enthusiast has named his daughter SLK after the Mercedes model. According to Ananova, the man, from Chisinau Cris in Arad county, caused a stir with his choice of name. Ica Mladin, the head of the local registrar's office, said: ``This man walked in and said he wanted a birth certificate on the name SLK Caldarar. We found that very odd and tried to make him change his mind.’’
But the father insisted, saying he loves cars and if the baby had been a boy he would have been named BMW. He said: ``The SLK is one of the most famous models of the Mercedes class; it's expensive and beautiful. If I had had a boy, I would have named him BMW because this car's hot and runs very fast.’’

FOOTNOTE: They should have just called her Moniker.

Can You Spell That For Me?

Witches Find Short Cuts To EU Grants

Romanian witches are carving out a lucrative new business - concocting spells to help locals get EU grants. According to Ananova, the country's witches used to confine themselves to love potions and spells aimed at getting cows to produce more milk. But the EU expansion has seen funding for new projects flood into the country and now locals hoping to gain a slice of the action are turning to witches to boost their chances. Witchcraft is a recognised profession in the new EU state and witches say they have adjusted their services as entrepreneurs turn to potions and spells to get the money they want. Witches also say that with entry to the EU and rights for homosexuals guaranteed in legislation, more and more gay men are also turning to them for help.