Friday, April 11, 2008

Splashing Colour Across The Sky

If Only I Could Paint Like This

Photographs copyright: DAVID McMAHON


I've always thought photographers and painters are richly blessed in this country, where vibrant hues are so often taken for granted. This sunset, with its flaming skyshow, was photographed about a month ago. I was standing on top of a hill in Narre Warren, in Melbourne's southeast, near the bike track of the 2006 Commonwealth Games.

I shot about two dozen frames very quickly, using different focal lengths and several variations of compositions to try and capture the colours as they spread and morphed across a wide expanse of sky. Looking at these shots, you wouldn't think I had power lines right across the scene in front of me. Sometimes the lines themselves can add to the perspective, but only half the shots I took that day have the power lines across them.

I was using a 300mm Sigma lens on my Pentax K100D - and it's always interesting to see the incredible amount of detail and clarity that the lens picks up. I was concentrating totally on the colours and the framing of each shot, but when I got home and looked at the images on my computer, I was intrigued to see what looks like a tiny purple ship on the right-hand side of the horizon.

If you look carefully, you can even see it on these low-res versions of the original shots. Could it perhaps be a 21st century version of the famous ghost ship, the Mary Celeste? Naaaaah, I don't think so.

In actual fact, I think the "ship" is really the office buildings of Melbourne's central business district - but I need to return to this hill and take some more shots to check this out.

I've shot sunsets from this point before, because it gives me wonderful access across a gentle but dramatic valley - and I ain't never noticed the tall buildings of the city from this vantage point. At this stage I should point out that the city is at least 35 kilometres away from Narre Warren, as the crow flies. No, I’m not kidding. It’s 35 kilometres – or almost 22 miles. Amazing, isn’t it?

So stand by and we'll solve this mystery together. Soon.

For other participants in Dot’s concept, go to Sky Watch Friday.

With This Jail Cell, I Thee Wed

Sorry, Dear, This Ain’t The Bridal Suite

Talk about an unforgettable first night. California police said a bride and groom spent their first night as a married couple in jail after their wedding party at a Vallejo home got out of hand. When police had to return a second time to the home, officers stunned both the groom and his cousin with a Taser. The bride was taken into custody on suspicion of public intoxication.

FOOTNOTE: Cuff syrup.

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Post Of The Day

We have joint winners again today - San Merideth with It Takes A Lot Of Mothers To Bring Up A Girl and Old Tom Wigley Magic Of Macro. Among the other contenders were Karoline with Karoline Blessed; Veg Plotting with Signs Of Tinseltown; Lime with Boston Still Stands, Cambridge Reels; Holly with My Celebrity Crush; Camikaos with Give Me Ice Cream Or Give Me; Jilly with The Most Functional English Word; Cowgirl with Comings And Goings and The Pea Green Boat with Midsummer Magic. Do pay them a visit and leave a comment if you have time.

You can nominate a post too. Just leave a comment here with the URL or link - and tell us the name of the blogger you are nominating. You can nominate more than one post. And yes, you can even nominate your own work. Righty-o, then, it's over to you ....

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

The paparazzi fled with glee
They ran down High Street, starkers
But the camera trained on them
Was Sarah Jessica Parker's

L Is For Levi's

The Day Denim Graced The Catwalk

Photographs copyright: DAVID McMAHON


Credit must be given where credit is due, and 'tis the beautiful Mrs Authorblog who was a model during her university years, before becoming a flight attendant with an international airline. But I can now reveal my own modelling story - with a slight twist.

I was 21 years old when I got a call at my desk, in the Calcutta newspaper publishing group that employed me. The caller was a person I had met a couple of times and he wanted to know if I had any spare time. At the time I was fairly active in theatre and so I hesitated slightly. I was working full-time, often working late into the night and sometimes on weekends as well.

In addition, I also played several sports. I did not have any spare time. None at all. But before I could say that, the caller continued and so I quickly bit my tongue.

"We know you've done some modelling and we'd like to know if you're interested in some more work with a leading client."

At this point in time, a monetary contract was mentioned. It was a decent sum.

Funny how you can go in a split second from having no spare time at all to plenty of spare time.. I agreed - but I was told I had to attend an audition first, followed by a stringent selection process.

"What sort of campaign is it?" I asked.

"It's not a print media campaign. It's a fashion show. Catwalk modelling."


And so it started. The first evening was a meet-and-greet, getting to know the organisers and meeting the other models. I was given the nod. I was now a catwalk model.

Well, not quite. I had to learn how to walk. Y'know, the catwalk walk. It wasn't easy. At first I was told that I looked like a soldier marching on a parade ground. "Loosen up," I was told. So I did. But then I was too casual. "Smarten up," I was told. This modelling gig was a lot harder than I thought. Funny how the simple act of walking - something we do every day of our lives - suddenly takes on an aura of complication when you move from everyday life to a modelling rehearsal.

Somehow, they got me to walk like a model. They deserved a whole consignment of Olympic medals for schooling me so quickly.

Then things got tougher. They told us who the client was and informed the male models that we would be wearing suits. No casual clothes. No sports gear. Expensive suits. Tailored in such a manner that they would mould themselves to our bodies. With that information came a corollary. Because the client was such a large corporation, their executives wanted to inspect the models.

That afternoon it was carnage on the catwalk. Several times the execs said they did not like the look of models. Just before I walked on, one of the choreographers pulled me aside and said, in no uncertain terms, that I had to surpass everything I had done so far. They were already reeling from the thought of having to replace so many models. So I walked like never before. And I got the thumbs-up.

At this point, we were measured for our clothes. A few days later, the amazing fabrics were delivered and the promise was accurate - we had never worn clothes with so much class.

Then things went pear-shaped for me. About a week before the first big show, I had to fly to the southern Indian city of Bangalore to cover a five-day cricket Test match. I was going to be away for a week.

The show's organisers held a council of war and came up with a terrific compromise. If I could fly out of Bangalore immediately after the Test match ended, I would be back in Calcutta with about an hour to spare. I would then join the rest of the models, the choreographers and all the organisers and we would travel overnight to Siliguri, in the foothills of the Himalayas, for the first live show the next night.

But even the best-laid plans of mice and men can sometimes go astray.

On the appointed night in Bangalore, I had checked in for my Airbus A300 flight and I was in the airport restaurant, having dinner, when the announcement came over the PA system. Indian Airlines had cancelled my flight. All passengers with confirmed seats would be put on the next evening's flight.

There was no option. No alternative. This was in the days of a sole domestic airline. A Government-owned monopoly domestic airline. I was stranded. And because it was way past office closing time, I had no way of contacting the organisers of the fashion show.

Mobile phone? Nup. This was before mobile phones were commonplace.


So I gritted my teeth, waited twenty-four hours and caught the flight to Calcutta on Thursday night. Early on Friday morning, I rocked up at the Indian Airlines office and booked a flight to Bagdogra. This was familiar territory for me, because in my boarding school years, the school had flown us to Bagdogra each year before we made the three-hour journey up to our school in the stunningly beautiful Himalayan town of Darjeeling. I knew this part of the country like the back of my hand.

From Bagdogra, I caught a cab to Siliguri, and found the hotel where the rest of the crew were staying. They were delighted to see me, but there was one piece of bad news.

When I hadn't turned up as arranged, they thought I had chickened out or that I had been taken ill. So no one had brought my splendid suits to Siliguri. There I was, having flown halfway across the country - and I had no clothes to wear.

Kind of.

Someone found my shirts in a wardrobe. I was wearing a pair of Levi's. So on the night of the show, I made a couple of quick changes, wearing my jeans and sporting a change of shirt each time.

It was the only time denim took its place among the ritzy suits and gowns. And I walked better than ever before. Real casual, like.

For the home of ABC Wednesday, go to Mrs Nesbitt's Place.


(The photographs accompanying this post were taken with a new macro lens, the SMC Pentax-DA 1:2.8mm Macro Limited. Note the clarity and the great depth of field - and watch this blog for more shots with this lens.)

Stone Age

Lucky It’s Just Toilet Humour

Does this happen in Boulder, Colorado, too? A tourist had a lucky escape in St. Gilgen, Austria when a 47-stone boulder (that’s 660 pounds or 300 kilograms) landed on a toilet seconds after he finished using it. Holidaymaker Josef Heller, 47, said: "I had just washed my hands - and as I walked out the door there was an explosion behind me and the whole house shook. "When I looked back I realised a massive boulder had landed on the toilet - smashing it to bits."

FOOTNOTE: Rolling stone concert.

Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Post Of The Day

We have joint winners today – cue the applause for Colleen with Slightly Bent and Vic Grace with Photo. Also in the running were Crystal Jigsaw with Shepherd’s Approval; Jules Stones with This Is No Way To Mop A Floor; Jennifer Harvey with Life Imitating Hell, And Turning It All Around; Casdok with Brain Art; Sandi McBride with Shoes; Mushy’s Moochings with The Crystal Forest; QuillDancer with The Spot and Fat Hairy Bastard with Monday Rant. Do pay them a visit and leave a comment if you have time.

You can nominate a post too. Just leave a comment here with the URL or link - and tell us the name of the blogger you are nominating. You can nominate more than one post. And yes, you can even nominate your own work. Righty-o, then, it's over to you ....

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

Muhammad Ali was so spry
He never battled fear
Float like a butterfly
Sting like a beer

Silver Ripples

No Smoke On The Water, Just Late-Evening Light


Yarra River, Melbourne, late on Sunday evening.

Photograph copyright: DAVID McMAHON

Rock Around The Clock

Attacks Are Simply Alien In Nature

A Bosnian man whose home has been hit an incredible five times by meteorites believes he is being targeted by aliens. Experts at Belgrade University have confirmed that all the rocks Radivoje Lajic has handed over were meteorites. Mr Lajic says the aliens are "playing games" with him and has had a steel girder-reinforced roof put on the house he owns in the northern village of Gornja Lamovite.

FOOTNOTE: Meteor, right?

Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Post Of The Day

Today’s winner is Quilly with #1. Also in the running were Jo Beaufoix with Celebrity Crush, Anybody?; Deborah Gamble with Finals Week Flirtation; Nicole P with My Trip To Richmond, Part 2; Jenera Healy with Weekend Wandering; O’Ceallaigh’s Felloffatruck Publications with Dude and Dude: Crucial; John-Michael’s I Mourned; Kathryn with My Weekend and Jane Wigley’s B Is For Best Yet. Do pay them a visit and leave a comment if you have time.

You can nominate a post too. Just leave a comment here with the URL or link - and tell us the name of the blogger you are nominating. You can nominate more than one post. And yes, you can even nominate your own work. Righty-o, then, it's over to you ....

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

In Western folklore
Is there anything bigger
Than Roy Rogers
And his faithful Trigger

Writer's Block

Now Blogger Lets You Take Sweet Revenge

Photograph copyright: DAVID McMAHON


Sitting at the computer and your thought process has deserted you? Totally deserted you? I often see posts by bloggers who write that they are feeling the pressure of writing to a deadline, simply to post something for the day. But Blogger has a feature that is going to make your life a lot easier.

You can write a post in advance and just use a simple option to pre-set it to post at any time, on any day. Yep, that's right. It'll post automatically.

Just go to Blogger's Scheduled Posts, where you can read the details and see the simple graphic pointer. Going to Draft Blogger will take you through your normal steps, through logging in and through the dashboard.

Write your post and when you click on Post Options, simply set the date and time that you want it to publish. You'll then get this message (see below) confirming that your post will be published at the date and time you have chosen.

Voila! It's so simple. But every time you want to pre-schedule a post, you need to go to Draft Blogger instead of Blogger.

(And if you accidentally publish a post instead of pre-scheduling it, simply use the Save As Draft option to remove it from your blog and place it back on your dashboard, to be published later.)

Arms And The Man

Robbery Was A Piece Of Cake

A Czech man abandoned an armed robbery after a shop assistant invited him for a "nice cup of tea and a piece of cake''. The assistant, a 59-year-old woman, said: "There was no one else in the shop, so I guess he relaxed and in the end he apologised. I said if he wanted he could come and talk to me and have a cup of tea and slice of cake. He agreed and then walked off.''

FOOTNOTE: Tea leaver.

Monday, April 07, 2008

Post Of The Day

Today we have joint winners, Suldog with the post Pa And The Big Fish and Michal with Remembering Daddy. Also in the running were Hilary with All Fogged Up; Deborah Gamble with Boyfriends Can Be So Handy To Have Around; Kimberly’s Home Sweet Home; Shrinky with Shifting Sands; Mielikki with Short Story Saturday; Old Man Lincoln with Hospital; Kimmy's Letter To My Brother; Sandip Madan with Of Thermometers and Ailing Globalisation; Maggie May with Ratty Is Driving me Batty; Epijunky with Revelations and Lin with Drowning Sorrows. Do pay them a visit and leave them a comment if you have time.

You can nominate a post too. Just leave a comment here with the URL or link - and tell us the name of the blogger you are nominating. You can nominate more than one post. And yes, you can even nominate your own work. Righty-o, then, it's over to you ....

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

A piece of cake it surely ain't
Using watercolours and oil paint
You'll have to sketch a lot faster, son
If you want to "draw" like Bat Masterson

Lager Than Life

Thirst Among Equals

Photograph copyright: DAVID McMAHON


Doesn't this look like some ingenious bloke has put a set of wheels on a crate of beer? Mate, if ever they did that, it would be a major marketing bonanza in this sunburnt country, where blokes are thirsty all the time.

Can you figure out what this photograph really shows? While you're racking your brain, I'll just reveal that I only had time to swing my camera up and fire off a single frame before the sight disappeared. Does that give you a clue?

Okay, here's your answer. It's a Tiger beer ad, on the side of a Singapore bus. I shot this during my 36-hour stopover in Singapore three months ago. I had just photographed something else when I saw the bus, a fraction of a second too late.

But I had the 18-125mm Sigma lens on the camera, which was perfect for what I wanted to do. So I lined up the shot, composed a really tight frame and just had enough time to hit the trigger once. The focal length of this shot was 78 mm and the frame wasn't 100 per cent accurate, but as you never, I never alter my shots in any way, so here it is - exactly as I saw it.

(The Odd Shots concept came from Katney. Say "G'day" to her.)

Dummy Run

Can Someone Paper Over The Cracks, Please?

Sounds like they're getting the hang of it. A Chinese artist provoked a public scare when he hung naked mannequins from the outside of skyscrapers. Shanghai artist Liu Jin put up four mannequins and put wings on their backs for the work, titled Wounded Angels. But passers-by mistook them for real people perilously clinging to the buildings. Police say they received several calls about reports of people hanging from the side buildings. To see the photograph, go to Ananova.

FOOTNOTE: Klingons, or Cling-Ons?

Sunday, April 06, 2008

Weekend Wandering

Please answer today's question on your own blog, any time until next weekend. Just link to this blog (or to this post) so I can follow the progress of the discussion.

The question is: What's the most crucial thing you've ever learnt?

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

Make sure you do look pretty
When you visit New York City
But never lose your bloomer
When you visit Tangalooma

The Sunday Roast

The English Blogger With a Hula Skirt


This week's interview is with Akelamalu,
who writes the blog Everything And Nothing.


The first of the standard weekly questions: Why do you blog?

I started blogging because my good friend Queenie asked me to. She had recently started her own blog and was so enthusiastic about it she wanted me to do the same. I was waiting to go in to hospital to have a total knee replacement and I thought it would be a good idea to keep a journal on how the operation had gone, and track my progress afterwards. Of course it has become much more than that.

My blog is a year old and in that time I have shared ups and downs and made many friends in the blogosphere. I would find it very difficult to give up now, its compulsive – hopefully I will carry on for a long time to come.

What’s the story behind your blog name?

Whilst trying to think of a blog name I came across a few sites on which you type in your real name and it comes up with a pseudonym be it a pixie, elf, cartoon character, porn name or in my case Hawaiian name. I liked it so I used it – Akelamalu. My blogging friends have shortened it to Akela, ake, malu, lulu, amulu etc, etc. I think that’s nice – turning a made-up name into a nickname – I’ve never had a nickname before, apart from fatty when I was at school!

What is the best thing about being a blogger?

It keeps my mind active. I’m always thinking "that would make a good post", "that would make a great picture", "the other bloggers would love that joke". I have also been introduced to Friday 55 Flash Fiction which has practically taken over my life! For 55 Flash Fiction you write a story - with a beginning a middle and an end, with at least one character and you have to do it in exactly 55 words.

I absolutely love writing 55s, once I start I can’t stop and probably write between three and six at a time. I have written over 100 now – not all published on my blog yet of course. I will carry on until I run out of ideas. People seem to like them so I’ll carry on, who knows I may even try to get them published.

Also because of blogging I found a way to fulfil a promise to my father – my proudest achievement, apart from producing my two wonderful sons. I have published my Grandmother’s biography – KIT – which he wrote 13 years ago. At the age of 83 he has finally seen it in print and fulfilled his promise to his mother. You can find a link to the book in my sidebar and how I did it.

What key advice would you give to a newbie blogger?

Visit lots of blogs and leave a comment – this way you build up your own blogroll. If someone leaves a comment on your blog reply to it and visit their blog and leave a comment – this is common courtesy. There’s nothing more disheartening than not having a comment acknowledged and reciprocated. There are some bloggers who think that people just want to read what they’ve written and they never have to visit –that is the height of bad manners in my book! There are some bloggers I no longer visit because of this.

What is the most significant blog post you’ve ever read?

I have read so many I couldn’t possibly choose one. I find it very humbling and I feel privileged to read posts about personal problems and events in people’s lives. I often find myself crying, feeling elated, sad, annoyed for them, when reading what they’ve written. Bloggers are great with advice, sympathy and empathy, the level of caring and genuine concern in the blogosphere never ceases to amaze me.

What is the most significant blog post you’ve every written?

I think you would have to ask my readers that! I do have my favourite posts though (listed on my sidebar) – do go over and take a look – and leave a comment please – I promise I’ll reciprocate (wink).

Today's Sunday Roast with Akelamalu is the tenth in a weekly series of interviews with bloggers from around the world.

Saturday, April 05, 2008

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

Juliet did suitors scan
For Romeo she pined
The play was one small step for man
One giant appeal for mankind

All Stains Day

The Glass Is Greener On The Other Side


Photographs copyright: DAVID McMAHON


My earliest memories of the many churches in which I have worshipped around the world are crystal-clear recollections of wall-mounted bronze memorial slabs and beautiful stained-glass windows. So with this week's Photo Hunt theme being "Glass", I scrapped my initial plan of posting a series of photographs shot in the reflection of glass panes.

Instead, this post honours not just the faith that I learnt as a child, but also the ancient art of churches adorned with stained glass windows. I shot this series of photographs at St John's Lutheran Church in Southgate, Melbourne.


These first two shots (above) were taken outside the church and, as the bearded and affable Kevin said in answer to my question, they were not part of the original building. The original church was located near City Road, not far from the present site. But it was demolished in 1989 as Southgate was being developed - and was re-built at the new site, in the shadow of the Victorian Arts Centre.


This shot (above) and all the subsequent photographs were taken in the little chapel beside the main church building and pretty much everything here is from the original building.


This (above) is another view of the same window, to give you an idea of the wide range of colours used in its construction.


This (above) is one of two arched windows from the old church and it now hangs on the east wall of the chapel.


I was so fascinated by the expressions of the disciples that I framed this close-up (above) to give you a better look.


This pastel shot (above) is the lower section of the main stained-glass window. You'll notice (if you haven't done so already) that the dark shapes in the foreground are actually the rounded ends of the pews, which were also part of the original church. I was really lucky with the afternoon light in this shot, because it just seems to caress the dark silhouettes of the hand-carved wood of the pews.


This final shot (above) is an interesting one. I'm not sure which side the original window faced, but in the chapel it now faces south. And as I lined up the frame, I realised I could actually see the hazy outline of an high-rise apartment building in the middle distance. Look carefully and you'll see it too - in the form of a slightly darker shadow on the red section of the glass.

How very intriguing, to think that the view through this beautiful stained-glass window is so dramatically different to what it was all those years ago, when the window was first fitted into place in the original building.

Friday, April 04, 2008

Post Of The Day

Roll out the red carpet and bring in the paparazzi to meet Seamus, who wins today's title with the post Close Encounter. And it is my very great pleasure to welcome the very gifted Deborah Gamble back to BlogLand - so do check out her post A Very Rich Man. The other posts that caught me attention were Michal's 40 Things To Do Before I’m 40; Katherine's Golf Can Be So Draining; Petunia's Dragon; Jennifer H with The Girl Who Cried Wolf; Mushy with The First Buck; iMac with Canvey Island; Camikaos with Lost And Please Don't Let me Find It; David Webb's Purple-Red Clouds At Sunset and last but not least, Jeff B poses a very interesting question on the post Pyramids.

You can nominate a post too. Just leave a comment here with the URL or link - and tell us the name of the blogger you are nominating. You can nominate more than one post. And yes, you can even nominate your own work. Righty-o, then, it's over to you ....

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

I can tally finches
I can measure inches
But I always need to extrapolate theta
To work out the length of a parking meter

Miss Saigon

Yes, This Huey Does Sometimes Get Dewy



Familiar sight, isn't it? But you can relax - I didn't risk life and limb to take this shot of a Huey chopper. Sit back and let me tell you the story ...

I was driving through Dandenong, in southeast Melbourne - and I had a few minutes up my sleeve. As always, I had my Pentax K100D on the passenger seat beside me and I thought it would be the perfect opportunity to shoot a quick series of photographs for Sky Watch Friday.


This UH1H chopper - known universally as the Huey - looks fairly dramatic in this shot against the late evening sky, and I thought it would be the perfect way to honour the many people who served in Vietnam. Among my blogging friends are several who did a tour of duty in Vietnam, so this post is for them. I don't need to name each one. They know who they are.


Yes, the chopper looks as though it was hovering above my head, but there's a very interesting background to this photo essay. The chopper is actually a static display. Look carefully at the first frame and you'll see a slender wire on each side of the fuselage. The wires serve a specific purpose. They hold the main rotor securely in place, so that it doesn't spin in the strong breeze.

If you pay close attention to the second frame, it seems like I've got the balance of the subject completely out of kilter. But I've framed the shot deliberately, to make the best use of the silhouette against a patchy sky - and also to reveal, at the bottom of the shot, the metal framework that supports the chopper a few metres above the ground.


Here in Australia, we have a veterans' organisation called the Returned Services League, or RSL. The Huey is the centrepiece of a Vietnam memorial that was unveiled on 30 April 2005, the anniversary of the fall of Saigon. The chopper was donated by the US Army and, as newspapers reported at the time, the Dandenong RSL paid $120,000 to have it shipped halfway across the world.

Below the helicopter is a sculpture by Melbourne artist Lis Johnson. The sculpture is called Side By Side and if you look at the photograph below, you'll understand how it gets its name. Civilians aren't very good when it comes to producing snappy salutes, but this is my way of doing it.

For other participants in Dot’s concept, go to Sky Watch Friday.

I camel, I saw, I conquered

The Champion Is Florence Of Arabia

Must be hump day. A beauty pageant is being held in Abu Dhabi - for camels. Ten thousand camels will compete against each other with the chance of their owners winning more than $8 million in prize money and up to 100 cars and other prizes to be won. Camels from Bahrain, Kuwait, Oman, Qatar and Saudi Arabia will take part in the competition. The contest is part of the Mazayin Dhafra festival, with a panel of expert camel appreciators judging each age group.

FOOTNOTE: Winner gets a Humpvee.

Thursday, April 03, 2008

Post Of The Day

Today's most outstanding post (and the best I've read in a very long time because it is searing, frank, honest and ultimately inspirational on many levels) is Crazy Cath's Losing Me. The other posts that made an impession today were Momma with the post Who Says Church Can’t Be Fun?; Merisi's Spring in Carnuntum; Jo Beaufoix with Let the Children Play; Mother’s Pride with Wordy Wednesday; Gourley Gang with Grandma’s Broken Heart; Parenting Issues with New Schools And Hugh Laurie; Camikaos with In With The In Crowd; Holly's I Forgot To Take Them To The Dungeon; Miss Burrows with Keep Your Passwords Safe; Brian in Oxford with It's A LabRum, Dad; Quilly's The Country Club Bum; Charles Gramlich with Sheer Creation and Lana Gramlich with Hooray For Macro.

You can nominate a post too. Just leave a comment here with the URL or link - and tell us the name of the blogger you are nominating. You can nominate more than one post. And yes, you can even nominate your own work. Righty-o, then, it's over to you ....

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

If the Queen had to choose
Garden-party guests who amuse
Would she have picked Presley?
Or opted for Carson Kressley?

K Is For Kite

Away In A Maanja

Lattai handles. Photographs copyright: DAVID McMAHON


It was only when I sat down to write this post that I realised something very important about my childhood years in India. Kite-flying was one of the universal pastimes that pitted kids of (for want of a better word) "fortunate circumstances" against kids whose parents would never be invited to the homes of the former.

Strange how long it takes for obvious realisation to fall into place, isn't it? I grew up at 3 Dumayne Avenue in Kidderpore, where we had huge homes and huge gardens and all the houses on the avenue were occupied by the families of officers employed by the Calcutta Port Trust.

We all flew kites. But so too did the kids from the homes further west, in the open field that was a world away from our cocooned upbringing, even though it was only a high wall that separated us from them. They would never come over, knock on our door and play cricket or badminton or soccer or hockey with us on our spacious, perfectly manicured lawns.

But when it came to kite-flying season, every kid was equal. There's something about that concept that I find particularly liberating, in hindsight.

This photograph shows a stack of a thousand kites.

Kites were very much a part of my childhood. Not surprisingly, then, there is a long sequence devoted to the art of kite-flying in Chapter 12 of my first novel, Vegemite Vindaloo.

From wingtip to wingtip, a standard kite (your everyday, garden variety) is about as wide as a computer keyboard. The flexible, upright central stick is about 40 centimetres long. The gently arched wing stick, slimmer than the upright stick, forms a graceful elipse from one side to the other. The thin paper that comprises the kite's surface is expertly formed, in a distinctive diamond shape, around the supple but reliable framework. Above the arch, a kite can be one colour. Below the arch, it can be another colour. The wedge-shaped tail, reinforced for weight and stability, is generally a different hue.

It was always a good thing to test and enhance the flexibility of a kite before actually flying it. To do this, you had to hold the top of the kite between thumb and forefinger of one hand and the bottom of the kite in the other thumb and forefinger. Then you had to bend the central stick of the kite slightly and rub it across your head, backwards and forwards. Sometimes, if you didn't have the action right or you put too much pressure on the kite, the central stick would snap and the kite went to Kite Heaven. The distinctive sound of the snapping stick is imprinted indelibly on my memory.


Before you flew a kite, you had to tie a kunni, or thread harness. I was taught to take a length of plain white cotton thread, then to double it for strength, before tying the kunni to the kite.

A matchstick or slim twig is the best implement to make four little holes in the kite's paper surface. The first hole goes on the top left quadrant of the kite where the bent horizontal stick crossed the straight upright. The second hole goes on the bottom right quadrant, about two centimetres away. The third and fourth holes were gently punched through the paper skin, about eight to ten centimetres above the wedge tail, on either side of the upright stick.

One end of the cotton cord goes through the two holes on the top of the kite and is knotted neatly together; the other end of the cord goes through the two holes near the wedge tail and, likewise, is knotted neatly together. Then you draw the cord away from the kite's surface, tying a loop in it at exactly the halfway mark. This is the trickiest part of tying a kunni. If the two sides are not exactly equidistant, the kite is hard to control.

Empty lattais in storage, awaiting razor-sharp maanja.

Then, your kite was ready to do battle. To launch your kite into the sky and search for an opponent, you had to tie the cotton harness, or kunni, securely to your "maanja". This was crucial to your success. Maanja has to be bought from kite shops. It is brightly coloured thread that had been treated with glue, finely-ground glass and dye. The sharper your maanja, the greater your chances of success in a mid-air battle.

The "kite shop man" would skilfully unwind a length of maanja from a lattai - after you had chosen what colour you wanted. He would wrap it switfly - and deftly in an elongated figure-eight between the exteded thumb and little finger of his hand. Maanja, surprisingly enough, was never measured. The kite shop men knew exactly how much to give you - and you accepted their judgement on pure trust.
Moisture, however, is a death threat to maanja. When I was a kid, the good kite shops would sell you maanja and hand it over to you like some sacred weapon, wrapped in newspaper, to prevent the moisture from your palms neutralising what was literally and metaphorically its cutting edge.

The maanja had to be hooked through and tied securely onto the loop of the kunni, or cotton cord. The kite was then ready for battle.

Commercial reality: advertising on a lattai.

But kite-flying brought a wonderful expression to Anglo-Indian English. Remember how I told you that the kite's thread harness was called a "kunni"? Well, the inimitable expression "putting on kunni" was and still is a damning label for anyone who tried putting on airs and graces. It's an expression I haven't used in about twenty years. Maybe I'll include it in my next novel.

For the home of ABC Wednesday, go to Mrs Nesbitt's Place.

Can't-Sell Phone

But It Won’t Fit In Your Pocket

That’s a big call. A Chinese man is hoping to get in the record books after creating what he claims is the world's largest working phone. His metre-high phone, which weighs 22 kilograms, is an exact copy of his own phone - but 620 times bigger. He said it has all the functions of a normal phone, with a built-in camera and internet access, but has to be plugged into the mains as he hasn't managed to build a big enough battery.

FOOTNOTE: Laud of the rings.

Wednesday, April 02, 2008

Post Of The Day

Today's winner is Lee with the inspirational post Rising From The Ashes. Close on her heels were Maggie May with Precious Things In Life; Akelamalu with Lost; Dot's Silhouettes; Bernie's Foto Blog with Bali Botanic Gardens; Old Tom Wigley with What a Differential a Day Makes; DKaye's Don't You Just Love The Sound Of a Nice Thunderstorm?; Ruth D with I Kid You Not; Crystal Jigsaw with Being Autistic; Down River Drivel with Kaboom and B's Dances With Wolves.

You can nominate a post too. Just leave a comment here with the URL or link - and tell us the name of the blogger you are nominating. You can nominate more than one post. And yes, you can even nominate your own work. Righty-o, then, it's over to you ....

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

If you simply must sing karaoke
Please ensure you keep it low-key
Refrain from warbling lows and highs
Even if you think you're Ol' Blue Eyes

Liquid Gold

Not The Blue Danube, It's The Burnished Yarra


Early-morning reflection. Photograph copyright: DAVID McMAHON

Start Bucks

Go Froth And Multiply

A businesswoman drank four cappuccinos in Heathrow's troubled Terminal 5 and was hit with a $750,000 bill at the Giraffe Juice Bar. Terri Patsalides, 59, said: ``When I got the printout I told the waitress that although they were very nice, I thought the bill was over the top.''

FOOTNOTE: Eliot Ness café.

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

Post Of The Day

Today's exceptionally valuable gold trophy goes to San Merideth with A Dilapidated Door Of Opportunity. The other top posts of the day were Katy Did Not with I May Have Snorted Derisively; Big Blue Barn West with Moves; Josie's The Secret Garden; Big Apple Little Britainer with The Boat Race; Lin's Getting Buzzed; Gawdess with the photo post Utility Poles; Classy Chaos with Stop The Press; Quilly's Honu Heaven; Expat Kat's Easy As Pie; Kathryn's Lucky Lady; Such Simple Pleasures with No Longer A Single Digit and Bruno's Nothin Better Than A Few Leftovers.

You can nominate a post too. Just leave a comment here with the URL or link - and tell us the name of the blogger you are nominating. You can nominate more than one post. And yes, you can even nominate your own work. Righty-o, then, it's over to you ....

Verse And Worse

Random Wit, Errant Rhyme. Not A Literary Crime

If you're looking for Halle Berry
In the Outback town of Bomaderry
You'll have to rent a dromedary
And Robin Williams for some comedary

Drop In Any Time

I'd Almost Forgotten The Sound Of Rain

Photographs copyright: DAVID McMAHON

Any idea what I've photographed here? While you're racking that nimble brain of yours, I'll get on with the post .... and I'll end with the answer.

Just when we'd given up on ever getting any rain here in Melbourne, the heavens opened up last Tuesday and we've had a shower or two every day since then. The timing could not have been better for many reasons, but this was a perfect opportunity to try out the macro on the new Pentax Optio S10 that I've been testing.

Like I said in an earlier post, it's an ultra-compact 10-megapixel camera with a 2.5 inch LCD screen. It's not much bigger than a credit card and is slimmer than a standard (empty) wallet. I often get asked by women bloggers if I could recommend a camera that would fit easily into a handbag. Men, on the other hand, ask about a camera that can slot into a pocket. Look no further than this little beauty. It retails for just under $300 here in Australia, which means it would be about $280 in the United States and about 150 quid in the United Kingdom.

Crazy Cath also asked me what the "SLR" stands for in camera-speak - it's an acronym for single lens reflex. She is on the lookout for a new camera in the $300 price range, so I would not hesitate to recommend the Pentax Optio S10. It has an on-screen editing function as well and is a very versatile piece of equipment. Also, in answer to Crazy Cath's second question about SLRs, yes, there are several digital SLR models around. And while the prices have dropped a fair bit, it's rare to find a decent brand SLR under $850-$900 - that's Australian dollars.

These pictures were all shot with the Pentax S10. I took each of these frames on "text mode" and the clarity of the individual raindrops gives you an idea of just how good this camera is. Looking for great value for money? This could be the camera for you - but take my perennial advice and always test a camera before you buy it, to make sure it's right for you.

Any questions, just let me know ....

ANSWER: The first two shots are of raindrops on an umbrella.

Open And Shut Cache

Title Recital Is Absolutely Vital

A self-help guide called "If You Want Closure In Your Relationship, Start With Your Legs" has been voted the oddest book title of the year. It beat off stiff competition from another entitled "I Was Tortured By the Pygmy Love Queen" to win The Bookseller magazine's. The manual, whose author is named Big Boom, is described as a "self-help book, written by a man for the benefit of women".

FOOTNOTE: Enclose encounters.